Through My Life's Love Journey

We all have had our fair share of the heartaches and heartbreaks and as funny as it may sound, but I’m actually glad they happened as these times have thought me  a lot about myself, people, love and life in general. No doubt love is great and as a matter of fact, it’s a wonderful feeling but the excruciating pain its ripple effect inflicts on us makes it dame easy to change that smile we once had to an upside down frown, which I believe logically explains why there’s such a thin line between love and hate. However, I am most appreciative of these moments and they are actually one of the major high notes of my journey through life but what I still find hard to explain is how something that brought so much joy can change so quickly to cause us angst and make us cry so badly.

Who am I? I am that guy, that individual, a bad boy turn good and swiftly growing to be the man he was created to be, who hasn’t just been heart broken by women he gave his heart to and loved unconditionally but has also broken a couple hearts to, so I guess that qualifies me to talk about love as I’ve been through it all; the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to the matters of the heart. Growing up as a kid, all I ever wanted was to love unconditionally and sincerely but I still can’t remember how and when I managed to loose myself, my priorities and goals as regards relationships, only to fall in love with a selfish and heartless me, who activated the beast mode in me and hurting a couple pure and innocent soul in the process and just before you castigate and bury me alive, love already did, trust me.

You know, love knows how to fight its own battles and it’s true what they say about karma fighting back and hunting us when we least expect, and that dude if he was human must have hated my guts so badly, as he had a first row seat to my life and never hesitated to pay me an uninvited visit each time I got my hands dirty after a fair game of card. Apparently, I have always had to learn the hard way and hardly got away with anything I did wrong. I have had to pay back in full and double sometimes and that basically explains my recent records of the heartaches and heartbreaks but thanks to grace, I haven’t given up on love and never will. Through my life’s love journey, I have learnt a lot about women, life, love, hate and relationships and I’ve come to understand so much as regards putting my cards plain on the table and keeping my hands clean if I don’t want that same fire I’m igniting through my lies to turn back to burn me.

Love is kind and patient and a loving heart, pure and tolerant, it makes excuses for the one it loves. However, let’s be careful not to abuse its privileges or we watch it turn back real quick and aggressively that is, just like a rattle snake whose tail has just been stepped on. The truth is, for every good heart you allowed to cry attract a million chocolate boxes to another who’s just playing with yours and anticipating the day to say goodbye. Life is a bitch, isn’t it, but so are your words if they don’t percolate with the truth. The way you lay your bed, so you’ll lie in it. If you give me lemons, I’ll bring some vodka and we can mix it up and start a party, that’s what love is meant to be about; helping and complementing each other. You can’t leave others in the dark and expect to be shown the light. If you throw jabs at me, you can be rest assured that there’s someone out there heading your way with a knockout punch.  Whatever you sow is what you reap, period.

You know, I’ve spent quite a number of years as an ignorant kid sagging my pants as I walked through the surface of the earth and most of which I had the choice of dressing right and staying sharp but I chose to act immature regardless. Through these times, I’ve also had the opportunity of finding peace with the old selfless me that wouldn’t hurt a fly but my ego had to meet the tiger in me and that got things pretty messed up. Now what am I trying to say? We are filled with choices each day and solely responsible for the consequences of whatever decision we choose to take. God wouldn’t force His will on us despite being the creator of the universe and neither will life. You are as good as your last decision because that gives birth to the next phase of your life so be careful when making these choices.

I will like to conclude by saying that love happens to define our existence in so much way than we actually think, it is the true essence of life itself and we are nothing without it. Even the creation of the earth and everything in it, which includes us of course, was done out of love and you’re dead the moment you cease to exude it.  However, the funny thing about it all is that there is no manual to how to love, it happens naturally. Any love forced is lust and headed for the bin. Through my life’s love journey, I’ve seen people been cheated on and hated for been too caring and loving, and on the other hand, I’ve seen people been loved and cherished for lying and treating their spouse like a piece of trash, it's just funny, the ways of love. You know, I’ve heard a million definitions to this four letter words I've spent the last couple of minutes talking about, but if only we look deep enough, we would realize that it’s only love that can truly explain itself.  Just be you, be ready and love will find you. True love I say is you finding that part of yourself that says I’m ready. We don’t find true love, true love finds us.

Kay Magnate

The Woman..

The woman who deserves to be my wife will see beyond what others see in me and pick up the shovel with me as we dig a lasting foundation for a love that knows no bound. She will derive joy and pleasure in getting on her kneels to pray for me every morning when she wakes up even before she says, I DO.  My woman, my everything as Patoranking said in one of his songs and with her I plan to spend the rest of my life in holy matrimony, till death do us apart.

She’s a woman of virtue, the type we read about in the bible and definitely not the kind that walks about the place with a sledge hammer and squashing hearts. I like to see her as the reason behind those many heartbreaks because if they didn’t happen, I will probably have ended up with the wrong one. So it’s true what they say that every disappointment is a blessing. And sorry for the hearts I broke as well, guess they weren’t just meant to be and I’m sure you found someone twice the man I was. I’m a king now and only hope this crown leads me to my queen.

Mrs Falaiye, that’s actually not a bad name to inherit if you ask me, but I must warn you that I’ve got pretty amazing sisters so you must be prepared to bring in your ‘A’ game. You know, I have always boasted to end up with a woman they would be proud of and finding someone more prettier than they are will only make me the true son of my father because my mother is fine like that. Anyway, love isn’t just about beauty but the inner glow is what counts, really.

I pray I find someone who loves God more than she will ever love me and bring up our children in the way of the Lord. Like I always say, beauty doesn’t build a home, the presence of God in her does and only pray she remains a pencil in her creator’s hand and allow him paint us a wonderful future. You know I was just trying to update my status on my blackberry messenger when the inspiration for this piece came along and only hope someday we might get to exchange pin and ping our way to each other’s heart.

Love is real, kind and patient and I’m definitely not in haste because we really can’t rush what we want to last forever. It is possible you are already a part of my life and maybe not but time is the true test of love and let’s hope it conquers all. I haven’t been the best guy, trust me but if you must belong to my future, you must be willing to forgive my past. The present is branded and new and so will our love and only the right one can forever keep it fresh like a new pair of Nike shoes just off the box.

I don’t want a love full of webs neither do I ever want us to get entangled in one of those triangles. If we are ever going to do this, let’s be dame sure we do it right. I have seen a couple beautiful romantic love movies that brought me to tears and wishing I played the lead role in a real life situation although I can’t promise to freeze in the cold storm while I put you in the boat to sail into another man’s hands but I can promise not to take you on a love cruise in a sinking ship, we can always choose to fly.

You know, I’ve dated a few amazing women I really liked and lost due to my anger and pride and only hope you are twice the women they were back then because I’m hoping they are all restored back to me all in one now that I’ve traded my aches for beauty and all thanks to the Holy Spirit for partnering with me on this life project that gave me series of sleepless nights when I had to stay up to pray and fast my way to the Lord’s heart and thankfully I received His mercy on a platter of gold.

So I ask, will you be willing to dive into the ocean of love with me if we were swimming with sharks and I don’t mean the vegetarian one, this isn’t the SHARKTALE. This is real and you must be prepared to hustle your way out with me in the midst of those flesh eating creatures because life is deeper than you think and be rest assured that someday our friends would get jealous and think of every way possible to tear us apart, stabbing us in the back and trust me, the least we ever want is to make that blood spill because even if we are lucky enough not to get shewed, the belly of the fish sure isn’t where I would want to learn my lessons, I’m not Jonah.

I am pretty satisfied with the beautiful names my parent gave me and if we were to ever have some connection with a tale in the bible, why don’t we take a trip back to the garden and correct the mistake of centuries ago and refuse to eat the fruit; fruit of lies, deceit, fornication and adultery just to mention a few and let’s choose to remain in love, to be faithful, contented, sincere and above all, heaven driven individuals who would someday build a home for God to dwell in and together we would raise heavenly children for God to work with, while we grow old in each other’s arms and watch the sunset.

By the way, I know there’s no such thing as a perfect wife or a perfect husband but we can choose to believe in ‘FOREVER’ and forever I say is giving one another unlimited chances to love each other every day. Believe in love, love and be loved and that’s exactly what I intend to do when I find my bride. And interestingly enough, I know who I am now and no longer lost in the shadow of myself so I’m not the type to beg for a girl’s love anymore, we are actually just meant to click. You are not doing me a favor, neither am I, we are meant to be partners and work together as a team and it starts with a decision to try.

Kay Magnate

Year 2016... Don't Be Fooled

I'm constantly baffled by the circumstances of life I've been faced with in the past months, let's just say the year 2016 for me as been a journey through life's merry and bitter path on my way to rediscovering self and unravelling God's plan and I must admit I shed a couple tears and maybe frustrated at some junctions but His unending grace and my undying zeal to succeed kept me going till this gracious moment I'm privileged to be gracing these pages. And if it is right for me to say, then without stuttering, I will say I've been through hell and back.

Truly, life is not a bed of roses and though I've grown up being accustomed to this phrase but I guess I'm only just beginning to understand the depth in the simplicity of how it sounds. Life is deep and don't allow yourself for even a mere second to be fooled into thinking otherwise. You're alone in this world and if you're lucky, you just might have your parent and siblings travelling on the same coach with you because our families are not even guaranteed to be trust worthy and dedicated to helping us walk right in life. I mean, I've heard and personally experienced scenarios of life whereby a so-called parent, brother or sister is the one ranging war against the destiny of their own.

It's sad when we begin to look deep into the affairs of life and trust me, the more you see, the less you know. Well, I'm grateful I was blessed with a wonderful family, God bless the woman behind my smile and to you my loving brothers and sisters and not forgetting you too dad, you may be gone for twenty one years but you're still a part of this team. Many at times I almost gave up in life but you kept me going because the thought of not been able to disappoint you all coordinated the motivation to stay on track, putting an extra soul in me. You have always been there for me even though I mostly caused you pain at the initial stage of my youth days when I inherited a misplaced priority from nonchalantness and wrong associations in the university that almost ruined my life but because I am a project that must be accomplished, no matter the change in regime, the allocation is continued and that I'm thankful for.

Seemingly, it's no longer news to you all my regular readers and followers that I had a pretty awful past and sometimes I feel I may be constituting some kind of nuisance on the pages of my writing pad when I take it upon myself to share some of these privileged information I wouldn't trade a billion for because they are actually what defines who I really am, but then again, taking a deeper look at it all, the only nuisance I believe I'll be constituting is to the camps of those affected by my testimonies and those who are obviously still feeding on milk because it takes a certain level of spiritual understanding to swim in the depth of my words so I ask this day that you seek wisdom because there are a lot buried in between those lines.

It may seem to you as a regular story but definitely not a regular interpretation. No doubt, we all have a story to tell but I don't actually tell these stories, they tell themselves through me, so please pay attention for it may not even be talking to you at this particular point in time but to someone next door who you can be a blessing to. The year 2016 has been one of the best year for me, not because I built houses, drove expensive automobiles and took trips to the bahamas. The truth is, I couldn't even step out of Lagos all year long but I fought and won the biggest battles of my life and still fighting and now I can boldly look to the mirror and be a proud reflection of myself and that for me is the definition of a good living.

Some are driving the best cars and living in mansions but don't even know what tomorrow holds for them. They are lost in the moment but I rather fight now and live later. And through this journey, I rose and fell to rise stronger and the farther I go, the more the secrets of life given to me. And on that note, may I quickly take a second as I advice you all never to trust anyone. The truth is, our best friends could be our worst enemies. And as a matter of fact, they mostly are. Well, I thank God for opening my eyes to see the true identity and intentions of people I called friends and I just really think the dictionary should loose that word and have it reinstated as 'FRIENEMIES'. You know, I just can't begin to phantom the evil that men do but all the same, I give God the glory.

Looking back through the year, what can you say are your greatest achievements? Is it the houses you built, the cars you brought or the awards and shows you headlined? The good people of the united states of the world, life is deep, don't be fooled if you presently find yourself walking through wall street and switching trips in those private jets, are you sure you got that paper right or you're one of those desperate brothers fast tracking life so that they can ride in those fancy trucks and fresh out Bentleys, it's only a matter of time when life comes calling and requesting for what you owe, it's always better to wait for God, He's the only one who truly gives wealth, the kind that last forever without future scars and regrets.

No doubt, life is good and we all want the good things but why start what we can't finish. I've seen millionaires end up walking on the streets without a penny to their name and even some end up more pathetic and run mad if they are lucky enough not to find an early grave. A word is enough for the wise, thread softly and don't be too impatient. Stripping a brother off his glory so that you may acquire all the riches in life doesn't make you a 'Red Star General', it only makes you a monster whose story is bound to end very badly. Retrace your steps now that you still can and if you're already too deep into it, well you have a chance to start afresh. I believe greatly in 2017 and with God, you can be free from your past and embraced in the future. I wish you all a merry Christmas in arrears and am very optimistic of a prosperous new year. God bless you all !

Kay Magnate

Cry A River

No matter the pain you feel, you can't cry a river, so instead of lying there shedding those awful tears, why not activate that warrior button on your blackberry "BOLD" and switch the gear a little. It's okay to feel pain but don't get weighed down by it. Life is all about lessons and how quickly we learn determines the credits we earn. God does not have time for pity, He's in the business of building soldiers that are ready to war, you just can't be caught hiding behind the wall. You are of no use to Him if you can't teach your hands to war, the world is a battle ground and the strong they say survive.

You can't cry at every gas life leaks at you, it's either you have your oxygen mask available on standby or find your way through that crowd quick enough to prevent the teargas from getting into your eyes, you wouldn't want it disrupting your movement or would you?. However, pain is meant to be felt and dealt with, they are part of what defines us, if you've never been heart broken, how would you know how to cherish one. Life is in stages, a time to learn and a time to share that which you've learnt and guess my experiences gave birth to this piece. I've had it worst than you can ever imagine but things wouldn't have been that rough if I had the privilege you're having reading this today. Back then I questioned God's love for me because I wondered why He would allow me go through so much pain, but today I've grown to understand he was actually building me to become the man I'm fast becoming and the king I was created to eventually be.

Our scars they say remind us that the past is real and today when I look back am thankful for those times because they are priceless and they helped define reality for me. Now I can proudly beat my chest and say to my past that I came, I saw and conquered. You paved a way for today and tomorrow is right in line preparing for the future. We are nothing without the pain of the past and as a matter of fact, the most successful people in the world today had it pretty rough at some point in their life too. But then, rather than just sit there and question their maker, they drew out strength from their circumstances, using it as a stepping stone that motivated them to becoming what they are today.

Truth be told, you can't make it up there without getting in a ring with your struggles, you just have to be well prepared to knock them out. Some are extremely determined and end the bout in the first round while some have to wait for a synonymous call to determine their faith. By this time, a lot of time and energy has been wasted in the ring and not forgetting the series of punches that knocked them to the ground. But then, our fingers are not equal, so whatever situation you find yourself, I want you to know you're travelling with the map the Lord has specially designed for your life and nothing associated with your journey was a mistake. The times you've fallen will determine how strong you'll rise. Life is not mathematics, the formula you need to adopt might be different from mine.

Never work with another man's time, even the time zone of some states in the United States differ, talk more of the world at large. You've been structured specially to meet a set goal and should work hard each day to know what tariff plan suits that. You can't be a blogger and activate a five hundred megabyte internet plan for your monthly subscription, don't limit yourself. Embrace the change and welcome new ideas. You've got more functions than a game pad so don't be limited to what you see alone but spend each second trying to unravel the mistery behind that which you don't see. So I say, rather than water your bed with your tears, why not allow the pain plant those seed of success and water them to reality. It's pointless drowning yourself in the river of self pity when new opportunities present themselves at our feet each day and all we just have to do is brush off the dust from the last fall and stand again. I repeat, no matter the tears you cry, you can't cry a river, so when life gives you lemon, why not get a bottle of vodka and mix it up with some ice.

Kay Magnate